Not that it's New Year's Eve...

And i'm at home actually, not influenced by anything...

Jesus lord God i'm going to sephora!!!!

The E.L.F palette is only 30 Dollars!!!!!!!!!

Sane people...

Are boring as shit. I think if all the world was sane, life wouldn't be as interesting. Crazyness makes the damn world go around, and for everyone who is sane, you know you enjoy watching crazy people's antics, no? Yes, you do. Big ups to the crazy people out there!

Nos terminamos...

Un dia triste...

Fuck feminism...

Womanism all the way.

Definition-

Having or expressing a belief in or respect for women and their talents and abilities beyond the boundaries of race and class

Coined from Alice Walker, supporting women, transcending race...

It's Today! It's Today!

It has finally come, NEW MOON OUT IN THEATERS TODAY! No other movie has mattered this year (well to me, at least... well, probably the Blind Side, and Precious, and I Can Do Bad All By Myself...hmm nevermind) but i have been waiting for this all year and i'll be damned if it is ruined for me by a bunch of dumbass tweens who scream at the gotdamn screen everytime Taylor Lautner takes his shirt off (not that i wont probably do the same in spanish, i mean Jesus, when someone is hot enough to make you stop talking on the phone mid-sentence in English to swooning in spanish, that's an amazing feat, I tell ya). But yeah, i'm going to go tomorrow in a theater where no one goes so i don't have to be around all that bullshit behavior. My sister told me that when you wait so long for something then hype it up in your brain it probably turns out disapointing you. Good piece of information coming from a 15 year old, no? But yeah, if it turns out sucking i am going to be a bitch for atleast the next week and a half. Hmm, just in time for Thanksgiving...

Yes Jesus i have done My Junior IB Oral!

Making me consider a career in teaching. i KILLED that shit! yay yay yay yay yay! * 12 Jesus loves me. The End. NEW MOON IS IN 4 DAYS !

Tell you about buttholes

Some people are just dumb as SHIT

English= Sadness

I officially hate reading. The end. Case Closed. Point blank. This is about to sound uber shitty but people who can't read are lucky as fuck because they don't have to spend countless gotdamn hours a night annotating and finding significance in a fucking play that was written 18000 fucking years ago! here is said book:
Antigone. God awful, tragic, makes you want to listen to emo music while contemplating jumping out of windows Antigone. Jesus, i mean it has a good theme and all, stand by your morals and don't believe in greek gods cause they kick your ass even when your trying to do something for them (Yay Christianity!), and that even the bad guy assholes don't get to die, their families do, BY THEIR OWN HAND. I swear, the greeks must not have been a happy people to write about nothing but tragedy and comedy (and of course in comedy i mean that everyone actually gets to LIVE). Dislike, that's all i have to say

"Wating For (Insert Name Here)"

What the hell am i doing with my life? More specifically my love life. I suck at love, i think. i have a wonderful boyfriend who i think is getting tired of my indecisiveness, seriously, he has a right to, it's been almost 10 months. I'm honestly trying to open up more but i think i screwed up my heart in my beginning stages of dating/finding love and now I have difficulty not being a cold asshole.
Fudgums

Homecoming...

Fuck me, the dreaded day is slowly arriving. I have zero dressitude, zero hairdone-itude, and zero new anything. As i am a jobless wonder, the buying of a whole new dress thing is kaput, which super sucks cause i DO NOT want to recycle dresses. NO NO NO NO NO INCORRECT NEVER GONNA HAPPEN! grrr!!!

My New Love

I love this shit. The new addiction. I'M ON A BLUSH OVERDOSE!!!

I'm getting old...

Tell me why i walked down three flights of stairs today and my knees started hurting, and now they make like this weird popping noise. OMG i feel myself growing deeper and deeper into senectude. But whatever. My weekend was rather awesome. Went to see Sorority Row and it wasn't as much of a disappointment as i initially thought it would be. It was between that and Jennifer's Body and there was no way in hell i was going to see that croc of bullshit. I talked to a guy who went to see it and he said that even with the girl on girl action (which seem really pointless to me and just a ploy for publicity), it still wasn't watchable. And THAT came from a guy! IDK it seems like movies are taking a turn for the worst. But as i always say, i don't give a crap about any movie that comes out before November 20 (by the way, that is the day New Moon comes out, if you didn't know). And no, i am not a Twilight obsessive... i'm a Taylor Lautner Obsessive.

The Open Windows are starting To Look Better and Better Everyday

i hate homework. I hate it with a passion that consumes my soul to no end.

Pastiche- A Day in my life... Scary stuff lolz

So, in English class we just finished the book "One Day in The Life of Ivan Denisovich" and i swear to bob, if i never have to see that damn book again, it will be too soon, no screw that, my ass is not reading another book by Alexander Solzhenitsyn (pronounce that if you dare). My teacher beat the shit out of that book, and i know its an IB class but Jesus christ, stylistic notes, passage annotation, literary analysis? Really? Well anyway, as if that was not enough, we had to write a damn pastiche of the work, for those of you who don't know, you're lucky if you don't, a pastiche is an artistic work in a style that imitates that of another work, artist, or period, and that's straight from webster. Now imagine having to write all the crap you do, in detail, in one day. Doing my damn make-up took up almost too paragraphs alone! and it had to be 7 pages at least. WTF.

Oh Jesus...

Why in the hell is everyone sick? i mean jeez, it's not like my school is particularly dirty, but everyone, myself included, is sick! super lame. Friday morning i got up to get ready to go to school and for some reason my head would not lift up. Strange huh?

Boys Who Look You In The Eyes

I honestly and completely love that! I don't really get that a lot and it's really truly awesome, kinda like they're looking into your soul, which gets kinda creepy cause it's like they can see what you're thinking, but it's creepy in a good way LOL. On a side note, i got the role of Mrs. Potiphar in the school musical Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor dreamcoat! YAY!

Joan Collins=My New Style Icons

Donny Osmond + Joseph and the amazing technicolor dreamcoat= Pure deliciousness

Omg i never noticed how wonderfully hot for a old guy he was until i watched the movie the other day. HOT HOT HOT HOT HOTNESS. My mother will be pleased. Oh and does anyone else think his weave looks like Taylor Lautner's twilight/ New moon weave ? I'm just sayin...

3.5 GPA mutherfuckers!

Look at me! i know there are so many more things to be proud of but damnit i'm happy. Yesterday in the wonderful class of Psychology, i asked the BF for a dollar, now normally he has change but he was retarded and didn't get any change before school. Now to my surprise, he hands me the whole 20! my first instinct was to kiss him and say 'oh you wonderful, blessed, good man', but, as to not embarass him with my tomfoolery, i took the money and left. i wonder what it would feel like to date me, with my dancing down the hallways to 80's music in my head and all that jazz. Oh! and wearing 1999 go go boots with a eyeliner tatoo down my arm. Pure awesomeness... Oh, the musical starts tomorrow. It's Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor coat. Oh Joy...

School

Go-go dancing is starting to look nicer and nicer. I think i cold do it. Looking at homework and IB classes are making my life as a stripper look nice lol. So, evidentally i look like a stripper/pornstar/ something in the adult entertainment industry because i take pictures like this.

Psychology Oral...

Writing about Major Depressive Disorder. Really difficult process and almost cried just reading the stuff. Hell, i'm about to cry writing THIS. Around the time i was 13 i had a very close family member who was undiagnosed at the time and a lot of these symptoms effected that person. Just seeing all this stuff in writing to do the research for my topic really hurts because i have flashbacks on what happened at that time in my life. I thought i would be able to deal with it from a non-emotional standpoint because it was so long ago, time heals all wounds, right? but in actuality, it still hurts TERRIBLY. Anybody who is reading this that feels seriously depressed to the point of disfunction, I AM BEGGING YOU, PLEASE SEEK HELP! You are not alone. If not for you, please do it for your families because the aftermath of your episodes will last with them FOREVER. please please please please please seek help immediately

Confrustration (Awesome word right?)

I'm so confused!! grrr, roar, and fire breath. Since school started my bf has been acting weird, and like all summer he was all sweet and that bullcrap but now that he is back around all is friends he acts weird. I don't know what to do. I am not trying to sound like those dumb bitches in those stories you read in magazines who talk about their boyfriend being so different around his friends and 'oh, i'm so sad and hurt and depressed, kill me now. Fuck all that. I'm just wondering why the sudden change. and btw, we've been together for 7 months so if he was going to change up on me he should have done that bullshit in month 2 lolz. Other than that life is swell. changed my hair color (again), am now 16 and a junior! yay

Poem Of The Month

Since May has commenced i have decided to add the new poem of the month. I've kinda been in an Audre Lorde mood so here goes. BTW, when i was searching for this poem the damn 8e6 filter blocked it because of the word junkie and said "illegal drugs". Friggin' a...


To My Daughter The Junkie
On A Train

By Audre Lorde

Children we have not borne
bedevil us by becoming
themselves
painfully sharp and unavoidable
like a needle in our flesh.

Coming home on the subway from a PTA meeting
of minds committed like murder
or suicide
to their own private struggle
a long-legged girl with a horse in her brain
slumps down beside me
begging to be ridden asleep
for the price of a midnight train
free from desire.
Little girl on the nod
if we are measured by the dreams we avoid
then you are the nightmare
of all sleeping mothers
rocking back and forth
the dead weight of your arms
locked about our necks
heavier than our habit
of looking for reasons.

My corrupt concern will not replace
what you once needed
but I am locked into my own addictions
and offer you my help, one eye
out
for my own station.
Roused and deprived
your costly dream explodes
into a terrible technicoloured laughter

Boredom In AEP

Why do we have this horrible class??? I it truly beyond me why i should have to sit in a study hall for an hour and 30 minutes pretending like i'm working. IT'S BORING! and next year since i'm taking all college courses i get 2 of these damn things. Lucky me. I am so ready for this school year to be over. This is the first year since like, 4th grade that i have had to be in school after Memorial Day. I don't understand why we have to be in so long anyway because we didn't have any snow days (which didn't really bother me that much because if i couldn't drive in it i wasn't going anyway), and we didn't have any other unscheduled school absences. Roar... Speaking of school absences my school is beginning to cross the line. Like 2 days ago my eye was red and i stayed at school, which really bothered me because i looked terribly vampire-esqe, and the next day i woke up and it was still like that! so i stayed home because it turned out i had pink eye and had my mom call the school to explain my predicament. Come to find out on Thursday that the absence wasn't excused and that they were talking about not letting me go full IB because of my absences! fucking absences, are you kidding me? i'm a bomb ass student, my test scores are helping keep this damn school an academy but you want to tell me i can't take college courses because of ABSENCES! absolutely not. that's like telling someone they should come to school sick, which is exactly what i am going to do. Next time i'm ill im coming to school and sharing my wonderful pathogens with everyone.

BTW, i have 8 days till i turn 16! YAY

My Gotdamn Eye Is Fucking Red!

I am beyond upset! my fucking eye is red and i have to fucking be at school with all the damn people thinking i have the swine. I DO NOT HAVE THE SWINE, I REPEAT I DO NOT HAVE THE SWINE. my allergies have been being a bitch for the last couple of days and apparently the loratidine doesn't feel that it needs to work anymore, so basically i'm up shit creek. I'm sick of school and I'm ready to go home.

In Spanish class haciendo nada because i already finished my work YESTERDAY, and i'm bored. i'm feeling strangely ugly today. My outfit sucks but i frankly don't give a shit.

Summer starts in 3 weeks and i will be 16 next Saturday!!! Yay

Prom...

Well, Went to prom on Saturday with the BF. Kinda lame music but overall pretty fun. i thought it was going to go COMPLETELY different but oh well, not too much of a disappoint. My mom was actually going to let em stay out to one but me being my lame self was home early. my dress was hot but it actually kept riding up in the back. i think it was because of my ass. Oh well at least i have an ass!!! lolz jk. But other wise it was good. Minus the slight duct- taping down of my boobs. i mean i honestly never thought that shit would work but it did! i figure if trannies can do it, why not me!

Me + Slightly Tussled hair= Not a Bad look

Oh well i was at lunch and i was bored. That's what happens...

Poet of The Month- Audre Lorde

So i'm doing this WebQuest in English class now about Audre Lorde and i want to share some of her poetry so here goes!

"Love Poem"

By Audre Lorde

Speak earth and bless me with what is richest
make sky flow honey out of my hips
rigis mountains
spread over a valley
carved out by the mouth of rain.

And I knew when I entered her I was
high wind in her forests hollow
fingers whispering sound
honey flowed
from the split cup
impaled on a lance of tongues
on the tips of her breasts on her navel
and my breath
howling into her entrances
through lungs of pain.

Greedy as herring-gulls
or a child
I swing out over the earth
over and over
again.

In American Government...

I'm currently in American Government and I'm having an epiphany... this class isn't too bad. I thought i would hate it, being my slightly anarchist self, but you know, it really isn't horrible. Now theater. That, my friend, is a horrid class. I think that we honestly need a new teacher whose ideas are not so antiquated. i still remember the time a couple months back where he actually asked my all black female class when we asked him why we had to find a play with all black characters "do you think you can play white?". That really upset me, but being as spiteful as i am i couldn't quit and leave the class. So, i am still in said class until next month (thank Jesus) and i never have to see him (class-wise) again. Or, if my prayers are answered they will find a new young teacher who has acted on stage more recently than the stone age. But whatever, I'll stop complaining. I'm really ready to go home. I was in bed last night when i realized that i had 3 sections of math homework to do. Now mind you, i figured all the homework i had to do was write this bill for American Government (which, if i may say i kicked ass on, format and everything), just to find out, while i was lying in bed at 1 in the morning, that i have heck of math homework to finish. But me, being my comfort loving self, was not getting out of my warm bed and going out to the freezypop weather to get my math book to do homework. I'm sorry, that was just something that was absolutely not going to happen. BTW this is April and it's 32 degrees now. That's Kansas for you...

Finally Done with the flippin Student Written and Directed One-acts

It is finished! done! termino! LOL i am finally finished with the one-acts (our last performance is tonight) and I actually get to sleep! YAY! I'm glad i got the experience and it does make my college resume look better but I really missed going home at 3:05 instead of 6:00. Even though every performance i do i complain about how i will never do theater again because of the horrible teacher, i know i will. i mean, theater is my passion. Well, lets say hobby. i don't think if i wasn't as good at it as i am that i would like it as much, but whatever. I FINALLY FINISHED MY PLAY! I submitted it for this Young Playwright's Festival at the Coterie Theater bit it was too long (which, in my opinion, translated into "too strong of a subject matter" for the venue) I mean sure, it was about lesbians, but there was no sex or anything in it, goodness! The plays that did get chosen were the conventional ones. Like, for example, there was one about a bunch nerdy kids going to "The Watchmen" premier. it was the same old same old, boy meets girl but boy is a nerd and girl doesn't give him the time of day but he ends up getting her anyway because this story is just like every other story with this subject in the history of time. The end. Now that the school year is almost over I need to start considering what i am going to do over the summer. I'll be 16 (YAY YAY YAY and SUPER YAY) which means i get to get my license which will open up a whole new world of opportunities (i.e i will not have to date some arse-meister who i do not like in the slightest just to use his car). I also want to work. Having my own money and not having to ask the Mother is much less degrading, PLUS i can get whatever i want and not have to worry about her so called "veto power", which totally rocks.

Slurs and other Things

It's terrible that in 2009 people still talk about each other on the basis of race, color, creed, sexual orientation, etc. I mean i know you can't change people's opinion but still there's no need to be offensive to anyone. I don't understand why some people find satisfaction in talking about people for things they can't change and then get upset when someone talks about them on something they can't change. So here goes. Today i was in Spanish class, the melting pot on intolerance which i have come to find out, and some kids starts yelling slurs about homosexuals, and me and my friend, being our progressive, open-minded selves, had to take him to the woodshed. Then, to my surprise and shock, another kid joins in with him!!! it realy shocked me how much close mindedness there still is, i mean i could see if we lived in 1950, but goodness this is 2009 people, WAKE UP!

Annoying Freaking Viruses!

Ok, so apparently there's some new virus out taking peoples personal something or other. Now mind you, i don't know the first thing about viruses but ya gotta question the sanity of people who sit around all day and do nothing but make computer diseases to piss other people off. i mean jesus christ, get a damn life, go to a party, get a girlfriend something that requires you doing something other than being on a computer all day making viruses to inconvenience people. Now the reason for my rant. i was trying to get on my frigging blog and apparently their on high security or whatever because of it and it keeps giving me some truly annoying message about my computer looking like an automated whatnot. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE CRAP AN AUTOMATED REQUEST IS! jeez i knew there was a reason i should've paid attention in computer classes but most of them bored the shit out of me so can ya blame a girl? no, my friend, you cannot. but whatever...

INAGURATION DAY!!!!

Obama is finally The President! Praise God!!!! Obama Obama Obama Obama!!! woot woot!